tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-181953727519479153.post4236494399306273227..comments2023-12-16T15:22:38.108-06:00Comments on mothermade: How We Must Love As Parents (part 3)mothermadehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15805762605100898914noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-181953727519479153.post-19380057430820499162014-11-19T20:51:19.592-06:002014-11-19T20:51:19.592-06:00Parents are chosen for adoption and those who do t...Parents are chosen for adoption and those who do the choosing have a responsibility to choose people who will parent well without being racist, homophobic, disabilist etc. Our sexual orientation is part of our identity and will always have significance. It cannot be a 'non issue'; that is the equivalent of saying the colour of a person's skin doesn't matter, which is a colour blind statement and racist. Telling a child you will love them 'even if' they are gay suggests that being gay is somehow inferior or an exceptional circumstance. Being gay is not a lifestyle choice -surely it's time we knew and understood this, particularly if we are raising children, those we gave birth to or who have been born to other parents? Those adopters who teach hatred, discrimination and practise homophobia should never have been approved to adopt -the lives of adoptees depend on appropriate and suitable approvals. We clearly have a very long way to go!mothermadehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15805762605100898914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-181953727519479153.post-33673675820237467742013-06-03T17:52:00.975-05:002013-06-03T17:52:00.975-05:00Debberoo, I understand what you are saying. You ar...Debberoo, I understand what you are saying. You are right, and what I am writing here can be applied to every parent. I have learned to parent based on this experience. I have other friends who are shut off from their biological families in the same way that Patrick was. <br /><br />But somewhere in WI, a family has photographs of Patrick, as a baby, a boy, a teen. As some adoptees feel loss merely from the circumstances of their adoption, Patrick lost again when he came out to his adoptive family. We talk about race to our adoptive parents, I think we should also talk about sexual orientation.mothermadehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15805762605100898914noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-181953727519479153.post-79344993154381145042013-06-03T14:44:27.969-05:002013-06-03T14:44:27.969-05:00I was so hoping this was not what I would be readi...I was so hoping this was not what I would be reading. Heartbreaking and I am so sorry for your loss.<br /><br />In trying to find the good I am so glad to read that Patrick did have his "family of friends". <br /> <br />However, I don't think homophobia is anything to do with adoptive parenting. There are sadly many biological children who have been rejected by their biological parents in just the same way that Patrick was by his adoptive parents. It is society as a whole and in particular religions that teach hatred, judgement and lack of acceptance of others that need to change. <br /><br />I do believe that change is happening but we have to keep pushing for it and being part of it. I am very hopeful that our children's generation will be the ones who will finally make sexual orientation the non issue for everyone that it should be.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com